Living in the world,
Yet not clinging to or forming
Attachments for the dust of the world,
Is the way of a true Zen student.
Witnessing the good actions of another person
Encourage yourself to follow their example.
Hearing of the mistaken action of another person,
Advise yourself not to emulate it.
Even though you are alone in a dark room
Conduct yourself as though you were facing a noble guest.
                                                                          - Zen-Getsu  courtesy of dailyzen.com
The essence of mindfulness is the open acknowledgement of all our feelings and experiences. When we can sift through all the judgements we impose upon ourselves we discover our capacity for compassion. When we act in compassionate ways we strengthen that part of us. Encouraging and advising ourselves is not as simple as this poem suggests. Behind both of them is self doubt and resentment.
Many of my clients struggle with the tasks of meditation and express frustration with themselves for not being able to stay focused on their breathing. A tougher experience is the reports of anger and impatience with others who are not as mindful. “They just don't get it” becomes a banner of self righteous mindfulness. It is easy to contaminate our refuge with pride and unworthiness.
Humility is a cornerstone for 12 step programs. A humble approach to life allows us to learn from experience and forgive ourselves for our mistakes. When we face a noble guest we can open our hearts to our compassion and loving-kindness. Our return to the breath becomes the essence of our meditation; when others are engaging in mistaken actions we can deal with it and not have the added burden of resentment; and we can relax into the peace and joy of the present moment.