You want to be a mountain-dweller,
No need to trek to India to find one.
I’ve a thousand peaks
To pick from right here on the lake.
Fragrant grasses and white clouds
Hold me here.
What holds you there,
World-dweller?
- Chiao Jan (730-799) courtesy of dailyzen.com

A "geographical cure" is a tempting idea for change. If I move to a new city I will be able to start over, make a new life. Over the years I have had many clients try this and all have been disappointed in the results. They soon discover the issues, that they had hoped were left behind, continue to disrupt and undermine their quest for happiness. The process of reflecting on the unwanted parts of our life is in effect the mountains we seek. To pause for a moment and understand the ability you have to look down on all the different parts of your life is to be the thousand peaks. It takes time and effort to cultivate this awareness. All of the struggles and fears become precious opportunities for learning and accumulating wisdom.  Acknowledging mistakes and disappointments with an open mind is another precious resource. A loving and compassionate relationship with our selves and our world creates a holding environment for us to discover the fragrant grasses and white clouds that have always been there.

Everyone holds a luminous jewel,
 All embrace a precious gem;
 If you do not turn your attention
Around and look within,
You will wander from home
With a hidden treasure
. - Dogen (1200–1253) courtesy of dailyzen.com

In psychotherapy I am always trying to assess my client’s insight. Is there an ability to reflect on his situation objectively? Does she have the capacity to have an emotional understanding of the underlying dynamics related to her presenting concern? There is a great deal of literature and research about emotional intelligence. The ability to find words that accurately convey an emotional experience is not something everyone has and it is something everyone can learn. The learning happens in a safe environment of empathy and compassion. Insight emerges in the dialogue between me and my client. It is the mutual experience of finding words that captures the subtle influences of long held fears and distorted assumptions about the self and others. The process of enhancing emotional self awareness is an effective way to turn your attention around and look within. To reflect with an open mind is an important step in cultivating the awareness of our luminous jewel. What becomes apparent is how the process of looking is the discovery of the hidden treasure.

Where there is beauty, there is ugliness. When something is right, Something else is wrong. Knowledge and ignorance Depend on each other. It has been like this since the beginning. How could it be otherwise now? Wanting to chuck out one And hold onto the other Makes for a ridiculous comedy. You must still deal with everything Ever-changing, Even when you say it’s wonderful. - Ryokan (1758–1831) -courtesy of dailyzen.com

All or none thinking is one of the more frequent cognitive errors we make when dealing with stressful situations. Either I am successful or I am a failure. The severest form of this is the assumption that the self or others are all good or all bad. A life from this perspective is filled with conflict and doubt. Experiences carry a potential for elation or despair. The idea of possibilities is intolerable because there is a required acknowledgement of possible failure and shame. The idea of knowledge and ignorance depending on others can be a hard one to swallow. However one cannot recognize knowledge if one does not know ignorance; just as one cannot recognize happiness without knowing sadness. Therapy is the opportunity to sit in a compassionate and non judgmental environment to consider all the positive and negative aspects of ourselves. That space then becomes a refuge for exploring and investigating. Wisdom is a natural product of this work and a very effective way of dealing with everything that is ever changing.