Song of the Grass Roof Hermitage

I’ve built a grass hut

Where there’s nothing of value

After eating, I relax and enjoy a nap.

When it was completed, fresh weeds appeared.

Now it’s been lived in

Covered by weeds.

 

The person in the hut

Lives here calmly,

Not stuck to inside, outside,

Or in between.

Places worldly people live,

He doesn’t live.

Realms worldly people love,

He doesn’t love.

 

Silvery moon hangs high in the sky.

I ride a tiny boat in the vast and misty sea.

Moon and sea forgotten;

I forget that I have forgotten.

And before the window

I sit quietly in meditation until midnight.

-Jakushitsu (1290–1368)

The Song of the Grass Roof Hermitage recalls the fleeting moments of reverie when my thoughts are absent, and I am fully experiencing the present moment. The moment passes and I think about the experience. My thoughts emerge from the feeling I recognize, and the reverie passes. Meditation is a practice to still the thoughts that stream through our conscious awareness. Psychoanalysis is a practice to ride in the tiny boat and observe those thoughts and feelings that interrupt our reverie. My client and I work together to cultivate a calm state of mind that is not stuck on difficult feelings or resentments, a state of mind that appreciates the moments at hand and the quiet meditation that can be found in this complex and challenging world.

 The spiritual light shines alone,

Far transcending the senses

And their fields;

The essential substance is exposed,

Real and eternal.

It is not contained in written words.

The nature of mind has no defilement;

It is basically perfect and complete in itself.

Just get rid of delusive attachments,

And merge with realization of thusness.

Pai-chang (720–814)

 

Tathātā (/ˌtætəˈtɑː/; Sanskrit: तथाता; Pali: tathatā) is a Buddhist term variously translated as "thusness" or "suchness", referring to the nature of reality free from conceptual elaborations and the subject-object distinction. (from Wikipedia). In psychotherapy and psychoanalysis, we can encounter this realization of thusness when guilt and shame are being considered with curiosity that is free of defensive reactions to feeling judged or criticized. Failures and disappointments emerge as opportunities for learning and growth. Our essential substance is our true self, the core part of our identity that we brought into the world at birth. Life experiences interact with our true self in dramatic and subtle ways and we develop ways of managing our lives to meet our physical and emotional needs. Relationships are an essential part of living and become very complex parts of who we are. A relationship with a therapist or a psychoanalyst provides us with a unique space to transcend delusive attachments and allow the true self to shine alone. To quote Shunryu Suzuki “Each of you is perfect the way you are ... and you can use a little improvement.”

 Evening mountains veiled in somber mist,

One path entering the wooded hill:

The monk has gone off, securing his pine door.

From a bamboo pipe a lonely trickle of water flows.

 -Ishikawa Jozan (1583-1672)

Grief is no longer considered a psychological disorder. Grief is a natural part of life. It embodies difficult feelings and unique challenges for everyone who faces this life-changing experience. We gather in times of loss, holding each other against the lonely path we will walk at some point in our lives. The complications that arise in this experience are brought into my office. My clients struggle with a sense of being lost or unable to move on from their deep sadness. We walk together in the somber mist and find refuge in the evening mountains. This space enables us to realize the profound changes that are unfolding and the beginning of a new life. The difficult thoughts and feelings become guides that reveal a new path. To relinquish old attachments and readjust to life without a loved one are the tasks of mourning. We carry the one we lost in our hearts where they remain in a perfect loving embrace. The complications of that relationship resolve into a meaningful presence that connects us to the infinite circle of life.   

 A solitary winter lantern

Casts a feeble shadow

Wind blows through

My flimsy hut and

Covers me with snow

I remember sitting

Cross legged on Wutai;

A makeshift door amid

The thousand year old ice.

-Han-shan Te-ch’ing

Mt. Wutai is one of four sacred mountains in China. It is home to 53 monasteries and a destination for pilgrimages. When my clients enter my office, we sit together and consider the storms of sadness and worry that dominate their thoughts and feelings. The connection between us becomes a lantern that clarifies the shadows of basic assumptions about themselves. We transcend the blowing wind as we discover new ideas and insights into the struggles that bind them to feelings of helplessness and hopelessness. This shared space becomes a refuge for us to work through the anger and fear that covers their thousand year old enlightened mind and allow the true self to emerge from the storm.

 That which was fixed, moves;

the hard becomes soft.

The earth is like waves,

my house like a boat.

A time of dread,

but also of charm:

Wind bells chime without rest,

though there’s no wind

-Kokan shiren

Strong feelings color the world in singular shades. Our thoughts tend to be more encompassing, and we are left with the assumption of a world that is good or bad. To hold all the different feelings in mind is the work of mindful reflection. Our capacity to know the hard and soft and manage the waves of day-to-day life requires practice. My clients take their place on the couch or chair, and we consider all the parts of their lives with careful consideration of the dread and the charms that rise and fall without rest. We work together in the analytic space to deepen our understanding and appreciation of their rich and nuanced life that offers endless possibilities so that what appears to be fixed moves and evolves in the dynamic context of our continual growth and development.

 

 The mind seeking for truth

Begins, like a stream, shallow

At first, but then

Adds more and more depth

While gaining greater clarity.

 -Saigyo 

People come to psychotherapy or psychoanalysis because they are seeking a better way to manage the stressors in their lives. It has been my experience that when I offer some strategies that have been proven to be effective, the unanswered question of why things are difficult can undermine the strategies and even compound the difficulties. The shallow stream of symptoms provides an opportunity for someone to deepen their understanding of themselves and gain greater clarity of who they are. We explore the depths of their singular truths with an open mind. The journey becomes an essential part of their identity where they can utilize new strategies with self-confidence and greater resilience to the difficulties that life brings.

 At the moment of awakening,

The Buddha exclaimed:

“Wonder of wonders!

All living beings are

truly enlightened and

shine with wisdom and virtue.

But because their minds

have become deluded and

become attached to a self,

they fail to understand this.”

 --Kegon Sutra

 

One of the exciting developments of psychoanalysis is the identification of attachment styles. We all come into this world with essential attachments to our parents and caretakers. Infants cannot survive on their own so the relationship with the one who feeds and cares for us is necessary for our ability to develop the means to care for ourselves. This leaves a powerful impression and becomes a frame of reference for our experiences in the world. At the heart of these changes is our true self, that part of our mind that is aware of the thoughts and feelings linked to the experiences that can define who we are. To understand this and allow our truly enlightened mind to shine we can consider all of our thoughts and feelings with a genuine curiosity that is not driven by guilt, shame, or anger.