Enlightenment has no definite form or nature by which it can manifest itself; so in enlightenment itself, there is nothing to be enlightened. Enlightenment exists solely because of delusion and ignorance; if they disappear, so will Enlightenment. And the opposite is true also: there is no Enlightenment apart from delusion and ignorance; no delusion and ignorance apart from Enlightenment. Therefore be on guard against thinking of enlightenment as a “thing” to be grasped at, lest it, too, should become an obstruction. When the mind that was in darkness becomes enlightened, it passes away, and with its passing, the thing which we call Enlightenment passes also.
-Lankavatara Sutra courtesy of dailyzen.com

There is an inevitable disappointment when someone has completed their therapy. The anticipated “better place” is nothing more than the mundane everyday flow of tension and ease. There is no emerging sunshine and happy background music. Termination is the term used for finishing up someone’s treatment. It’s a pretty ominous term but it conveys some very important dynamics in the process of change. The uniqueness of the therapeutic relationship allows for a very close, personal connection that is contained in a professional setting. A safe and empathic space is a good setting for new ideas and experiences. When the goals of the treatment have been reached we begin the process of summarizing the process of change; understanding the new found skills and confidences in the here and now; and anticipating challenges in the future.My client walks out of my office as a fellow traveler on life’s journey. No more, no less. Delusion and ignorance do not vanish when therapy is completed. My client’s enhanced self awareness helps her to be on guard and recognize when she is trying to grasp enlightenment. The way out of the darkness is in the tensions and the ease of our every day lives.

It is most urgent that you seek real, true perception,
So you can be free in the world
And not confused by ordinary teachers.
It is best to have no obsessions.
Just don’t be contrived.
Simply be normal.
You impulsively seek elsewhere,
Looking to others for your own hands and feet.
This is already mistaken.
- Linji (d. 867) courtesy of dailyzen.com

An understandable issue with psychotherapy is this idea that there is someone out there who knows more than me about how to live my life. The response to suggestions of seeking professional help is "I can solve my own problems!" There is a stigma associated with seeing a therapist, that someone is crazy and unable to care for themselves or worse pose a threat to society. This becomes even more complicated when it is parents seeking help for their child. Is there a way to seek real and true perceptions in the therapist's office? How would you know if it was real? What is the difference between a therapist and an ordinary teacher?
We know that the experience of being understood is a more powerful curative factor than the clinician's degrees and theoretical orientation.  What is real is what makes sense and if there is the experience of having a new idea or perspective on an issue then you are the one who has made the discovery. Therapy is different from the classroom because there is no lesson plan, there is a companion for your journey who will ask questions and learn from you as you learn about yourself. This is the genuine therapeutic process, my training and experience provides me with a fund of knowledge to choose the right kinds of questions at the right time in the journey- unless I don't and there is a break in the connection. What is unique in therapy is how even the breaks become important opportunities for learning. The journey in therapy is not supposed to be easy, the hardest part will be acknowledging your hands and feet in a compassionate and non-judgemental way. Together we will seek that elusive simplicity.